Hero. A Halfassed Poem.... thing.

Hero

Look outside.

Fear.

Death.

Hate.

What can I do?

How can I help?

Put it on.

A Hat.

A Coat.

A Mask.

No Thanks Needed.

Stand for what's right.

Honor.

Charity.

Compassion.

Help the Helpless.

Defend the Defenseless.

Code of a Hero.

A Symbol of Hope.

Discovering Ashes (12)

The stairs themselves were rusty, metal grated stairs. Obviously not meant for public use. I mean, what architect in their right mind would make the general public go up and down creaky, creepy, metal grates for stairs? They didn't match the outside at all! Hell, even the inside – as much as it was falling apart – had that weird.... pseudo-Gothic architecture all over! Arches, mini statues and gargoyles. Was this place really the main way hundreds of thousands of people got to this city? 

 

No matter.

I pulled open the rusted gate that closed the stairs off. Its bolts and hinges screamed at me to stop, to let it rust in peace. Chills went up my spine at the sound along with the piercing of my ears. Still, I had a job to do. Which meant running into the depths of hell if I had to.

“Here goes nothing...” I mumbled as I took my first few steps onto the stairs.

The grates shook with each move I made. Shift my weight to the left? Whole stairway moved, and a new layer of rust and dirt hit the ground beneath me. This was going to be fun...

With each step, I could hear the grates below me bending and bowing with a weight they hadn't felt in decades. God, where was Dex and his constant joking when I needed him? Anything to get my mind off of the idea of falling through one of these things and getting stuck in the oldest, dankest, darkest “basement” I'd ever seen in my life. Or smelled in this case. I swear, my light didn't go any farther than maybe twenty feet before all of the dust and dirt in the air just stopped it!

My heartbeat quickened as my feet touched the ground at the end of the stairway. I felt like I was some kind of explorer in an ancient ruin in some forgotten area of the world. For a minute, I wondered if this was what those jackass urban explorers I'd seen on the news loved about places like this. But that didn't make any sense, because they talked about the thrill and excitement of it all. I just felt like I wasn't welcome. An overwhelming sense of dread and hate filled the air all around me.

Discovering Ashes (11)

Immediately, I moved into the station itself. Inside, it was dark. Of course, that's something I should've expected from a rundown, abandoned train station, even in the afternoon! But something about it was off. It was too dark inside. With the sun blazing down outside, it should've been dark, but I still should've been able to see for Christ's sake!

“'ey Jack, Imma head to the left, see what's down that way. Alright?”

Did Dex say something? I wasn't too sure. I kept hearing something in the distance. Echoing.

“You hear that?” I asked. “It's like a... kid. I swear, I hear a kid down here!”

“A kid? You're hearin' things, Jackie-boy!”

“Heh.. Yeah, you're probably right. Just the wind or somethin', right?”

Dex moved off to the left, mentioning that he'd be down that way if I needed him or something. That sound I kept hearing was still nagging at me. The way the building looked on the inside wasn't helping matters, either. The wind or whatever it was that kept making that noise was making me a bit uneasy. It sounded... human, but not. And the way the crumbling walls looked in the darkness around me? It just made the whole area look – what? Odd? Out of it? Alien? Yeah, Alien's a good way of putting it. It didn't look or sound or feel like anything any sane person would ever build!

Shaking my head, I tried to get rid of the uneasiness. Nothing doing.

“S'okay, Jack,” I assured myself. “Just your mind playing tricks on ya.”

I walked forward, trying to keep an eye out for anyone or anything suspicious. Maybe I'd find the murderer and get some kind of medal? Would be kinda hard to know who he was or anything, though, since I didn't get to look at the body. How would I know what weapon he used?

Dammit, Holmes! That's filed under 'Shit I Need To Know'!

I got really nervous as soon as that thought hit me. A few deep breathes should've calmed me down, but they didn't. I pulled my pistol and flashlight from their respective spots on my belt. My right thumb flipped the safety off while the other pushed in the button on the end of the flashlight. The light was pretty damn bright in the dark. It comforted me in a weird way. At least now I could see what was shadow and what was rubble!

To my immediate left was a set of stairs, leading down. It was a good thing I'd turned on my light when I did, because otherwise, I probably would've missed it!

Discovering Ashes (Part .... Whatever.)

Chuckling, Dex answered the call. Sam sounded pissed!.... Or possibly annoyed. With her, it was hard for me to tell sometimes!

“Hey there, Sam-Girl! Whatcha got for us?”

“Cut the crap, Dexter. We've got a two-forty-one on South Wenchester. All hands on deck for this one, boys!”

“ Two-forty-one?” I mouthed.

I could feel the blood rushing to my face. My heart skyrocketed. In some morbid way, I was excited, relieved to get away from the semi-boring life of handing out speeding tickets every day. A real, honest to God murder! God help me, I felt like I was about to jump out of my seat, giddy as a school girl! It meant that I was back to helping keep the streets clean, catching the real bad guys!

“Jesus Christ, Sam... Gimme an address, we'll be there as soon as we can.”

“2540. You'd better hurry.”

“2540?” I repeated. “That's the old Station, isn't it?”

Dex shrugged.

“We're already there, Sammy.”

***

I was a bit surprised to find that I was right when I asked if the address was the old train station. When we pulled up to it, I was mesmerized. I didn't really see the patrol cars or even the forensics van. My entire attention was drawn to the building itself. Dilapidated, rotting away. A shell of it's former self. But what was so impressive about it was the sculptures surrounding almost every arch and archway. Every window. Some were small, others were.... huge. But not.

It felt like I was sitting in the car for a lifetime, admiring the works. Drawn in by the building. But it can't have been long, because the sound of a door opening brought me back to real life. Back to what I could only assume would be perimeter duty.

I'll be damned if I get stuck keeping the press-jockeys out!

Dex and I walked in tandem towards the main group of cops and detectives. And who should be there to acquaint us with the scene but the Queen Bitch of Ineptitude herself; Dick Holmes.

“Oh Fuck meee....” I whispered to Dex.

“I know, right? Looks like a fuckin' cold one already.”

“I swear, I can feel the bitchiness, Dex. It's contaminating the air!”

I chuckled a bit when Dex let out a nice, loud laugh. I swear, the guy found anything funny. It was good to have him as a partner sometimes. He helped keep things lite. Of course, his laughter drew the attention of most of the force there. Including Holmes.

“Well, well, if it isn't Carnegie and his boyfriend! Good of you two to join us!” She chided.

“My my, Detective! You remembered my name! Did the Lieutenant tie a string 'round your finger this morning? Or did you have to study flashcards last night?!”

Holmes was quiet for a second. Dex flipped her the bird with a smile on his face. A few of the guys and gals around us laughed a bit. Given just what we were here for, I'm sure it was a welcome distraction.

“So what's the deal, Detective?” I asked after everything'd calmed down and she went back to barking out orders.

Holmes glared at me. I swore, she was trying to stare a hole right through me or something! I wonder if she wished she had laser vision or something like that?

“Since you seem to think that my job's so easy, Officer, then you get to go looking through the lower levels for any would-be murderers! Try not to touch anything... important, you got it? Mark and bag up evidence as you come across it.”

I thanked whatever God was listening that I wasn't stuck keeping random people behind the yellow tape. I'm sure Holmes thought she was being clever by 'forcing' me to go look for whoever might've done.... whatever had been done.

Adversity

In our lives we are pressed against the wall numerous times. We face adversity constantly, and those who would harm us show no signs of stopping. But the measurement of a truly good, truly strong person is not by how much they attain, but by how much strength they have through that adversity. Through our problems, we find a courage and determination not seen at any other time in our lives. It is at that moment, when you're ready to give up, that your true nature can shine through and when you can stand up and say, "I. Will. Not. Quit."

Discovering Ashes (Part 9)

Next thing I knew, I was screaming and back in the patrol car. I looked out of the windows, confused, only to hear Dex beside me laugh. I jumped against the door, still shaken from that.... what the hell had it been anyway? A nightmare? Nightmares never felt that real before. My heart was pounding in my chest, and I was having a bit of trouble breathing. With each beat of my heart, I felt my lighter.

“You okay, Jack?” I heard Dex say between chuckles.

I payed him no mind as I fumbled for my lighter, patting myself all over to make sure I wasn't on fire just in case. When my fingers touched the chrome of the Zippo, it was warmer than usual. I shuddered, shaking my head as I pulled the lighter from my pocket. Why was it so warm? I couldn't help but think back to my nightmare. The burning had started with my lighter, but why? Why did I have that dream? Why was I getting so worked up over a silly nightmare?!

“Jack, you alright, man?” Dex put his hand on my shoulder.

Like before, I recoiled a bit, although this time it was much smaller of a reaction. I shook my head, dropping my lighter back into it's proper place.

“I'll be fine,” I assured him. “Fuckin' nightmare.”

“You, afraid of a little dream?! C'mon, Jack, you gotta be pullin' my leg!”

“I'm serious, Dex. I ain't had a dream like that since I was a kid!”

“Bullshit! Na, you're not the kinda guy to get worked up over a fuckin' dream, Jack. I know you better than that!”

“Can we just fuckin' drop it!?” I didn't realize it that I'd started to raise my voice.

“Jesus Christ, always with the God damn 'You ain't this' or 'You ain't that'! Lemme tell you somethin', partner, you might be a damn good cop, but you ain't no Dick fuggin' Tracy!”

I was fuming. At what, I didn't know. I knew I was angry at Dex for pressing the issue about the dream, but I really wasn't sure just why. Dex retreated back to his seat, watching the road in front of us quietly. I'd probably really hurt the guy's feelings, but dammit, he deserved it!... I think. There was something about the dream that was... familiar but not. It was a weird sense of Deja vu.

My heart skipped, no stopped, when my phone went off. I tried to ignore it, but with Crazy On You filling the car, Dex just looked over while I continued to ignore it. If I didn't answer it, then whatever bad news came with the phone call wouldn't reach me!

“You gonna get that, Jack?” Dex asked. I shook my head in response.

Of course, eventually, towards the end of the phone's ringing, I answered it. Morbid Curiosity, I suppose. I took a deep breath before actually saying anything.

“Yea-yeah?”

“Jack,” Dianne sounded annoyed. “I thought I asked you to take out the trash this morning before you left?”

I started laughing. Dianne didn't like that at all, and started yelling at me. Dex looked over at me, confused. And I couldn't help but keep laughing at my own stupidity! Stupidity and Relief!

“The hell's wrong with you, man?” Dex asked.

“Oh God, I'm sorry!” I choked out between laughs. “Oh, Di, I'm sorry, it's just a relief to hear you right now!”

Dianne said something, but I couldn't hear her, having pulled the phone away from my ear to get a hold of myself. Dex joined in on my laughter until the voice of Samantha, our Dispatcher, came over the radio.

“'ey, Jack, we got work, man!”

“Alright,” I turned my attention to Dianne, moving the phone back to my ear. “I'll take it out as soon as I get home, okay, Di? I gotta go keep the streets safe! Love ya!”

“Be safe, okay, Jack?” She said, the anger and annoyance replaced by a soft worried tone. “I swear if you make me have to go to a hospital, I'll kill you!”

“No worries, babe! See you when I get home!”

I hung up the phone. Sam was still calling our car, Dex was mocking me for the “lovey dovey shit”. With a smile, I socked him in the arm, glad I was finally getting over my anxiety from the nightmare. Glad that Dex was Dex and wouldn't hurt a fly. Well... as long as he liked the fly, he wouldn't hurt it.

Discovering Ashes (Part 8)

When the paramedics showed up for the kid, so did a few other officers, including lieutenant Samantha Codler and her “friend” Detective Holmes. Yeah, “Holmes”. I always had to laugh that she was one of the worst detectives I'd ever seen but had the same name as the world's greatest!

“Alright, Officer.... Carnegie?” Holmes shrill voice rose over the muted cries of the kid I'd shot.

“The very same, Detective!” I replied snarkily.

I seriously hated the bitch. Not because she was 'close' to the lieutenant, no that'd just be cliché and stupid. Wasted hate, really. No, I hated her because she had this holier than thou attitude towards guys like me. It came from her not being a native of this city, I think. She came from some podunk little town in Colorado – or at least she claimed to – where people 'treated people like people'. Why she ever moved to this city was beyond me.

“Don't get snide with me, Carnegie. I wanna know why you shot that kid in the back, right the hell now!”

She sounded like she was constipated, the way she forced that anger, I had to chuckle. Dex was off to the side, covering his mouth while watching, trying not to laugh himself. The lieutenant placed a hand on Holmes' shoulder, ushering her to the side. Of course, it shut Holmes up, but also made her young-ish face scrunch up, wrinkling the skin at her brow and her nose. She looked like a God damn pig!

“It's simple, really,” I said with a stupid grin on my face.

I really needed to learn how to keep a straight face while talking with Holmes.

“The kid took a few potshots at me and I returned fire! Don't believe me, just take a look at my shoulder!”

I pointed out the singed hole in my uniform. Holmes face immediately changed from one of constipated pig anger to confusion and curiosity. Like she'd never seen a bullet hole in a piece of fabric before. I could see her working things out in her head, forcing all of those too-small-to-work cogs to clunk together in something that might resemble thought.

“Here's this,” I said, handing over the riddle I'd found to the lieutenant. “It fell out of the kid's pocket. Figure it might be important.”

The lieutenant took a quick look at the paper, mumbling what I could only guess was the riddle. She held it for a few more moments before passing it on to Holmes who did roughly the same. Only she chuckled and read the name signed at the bottom aloud.

“A. F. Reinde? The hell kind of name is Reinde?”

“I think,” I started. “It's meant to be an anagram or alias of some kind for 'a friend'.”

Holmes smiled and handed the paper back to the lieutenant.

“Very good, Carnegie! Y'know, you'd make a good detective yourself!”

'Yeah, over my dead body', I wanted to say. But hey, I'd thought about it before. Detectives got more pay than I did. They got more time off than I did. And they did less dirty work than I did. Sounds like a decent job, right? Not to me. I liked the chance to dress in plain clothes and still carry the badge, sure, but I just thought I did more good out on the streets than not. People tend to not do things when a uniform's close by.

Instead of being sarcastic or rude with her, I shrugged and popped out my cigarettes. Getting shot at has a way of fraying your nerves and I seriously needed a stress reliever right now. Ms. Bitch wasn't helping matters, either.

“So what's it mean?” I asked after taking a long drag of the cigarette.

The lieutenant spoke up after having spent the last few moments wandering back and forth, her hand on her chin.

“Well, I'd say it's the delusional ramblings of a madman, myself, but the answer is plain as day; a human.”

“A human, huh? Well, that narrows things down a bit.” I mumbled. The lieutenant glared at me. Hey, I respected her, but I knew in my gut that there was something to the riddle and “A human” just didn't cut it for an answer. It didn't.... fit somehow!

“Sorry, Lieutenant.” I apologized. “Still a bit woozy from the whole deal.”

“Yeah, alright Carnegie. We'll finish this later. Did the EMTs check out that shoulder?”

“No ma'am. Shoulder's fine, don't worry about it. I've had worse!”

“Even so, I don't need to explain to the higher-ups why there's a cop running around with a broken shoulder blade on my watch.”

***

I kept running over the riddle the kid had on him for a while after that. The kid had said in a statement that he'd been sent after me, specifically. To “get my attention”. That, of course, made me too close to the issue, which meant me and Dex were pushed back onto street duty quicker than you could say “Freeze”.

Before I knew it, It'd been an entire week since the whole deal. While Dex sat in the driver's seat of our patrol car, I relaxed next to him, looking out into the skies. They were cloudy, and looked like the sky was confused. All of these different shades of gray and white and black. Perfect day for how I was feeling about that damn Riddle. Everything I thought about came back to that blasted thing! For the life of me, I couldn't think of an answer. Everyone else said it might've just been some delusional rambling that the kid had scrawled down, but the kid said he didn't remember any kind of riddle or piece of paper! So what did that mean? To me, it meant that someone out there wasn't just out to get me, it meant they wanted to test my patience and make sure that I knew who they were.

If I passed this 'test'.

“Hey, Dex,” I asked. “What do you think about that riddle from last week?”

Dex sighed and shook his head. It might've been the fifth time I'd asked him that question in the past three days. I knew his answer, already, but I was just asking for the sake of asking at this point.

“It's nothin', Jack! Just a buncha bullshit that crackpot kid wrote down!”

“But what about that whole deal that he was sent to 'get my attention' or whatever?”

“You honestly believe the jackass who tried to kill you?”

“And you wouldn't?”

Dex was quiet for a while. I could see that he was thinking about what I'd said. I'd never thought to bring up that logic previously, and now it just seemed like it was obvious to bring up at the beginning of the whole ordeal!

“Wouldn't it?”

“I gotta admit, Jack; you've got a point.”

“I know! That's what I've been sayin'! It doesn't. Make. Sense!”

“Hey, calm down, Jack! Now, look, it doesn't matter what that kid said. Is it weird? Yeah, I'll give ya that much, and it does sound freaky! But you gotta remember that he's... kinda wrong in the head, too!”

This time, it was my turn to get quiet. It was clear that Dex wasn't going to listen to my 'delusional ramblings' anymore. I figured it was best to let it go for now, or else I might start to get annoying; Dex's job, not mine.

Thank God for phones. Mine started going off, rescuing me from the conversation me and Dex had just had. While I fumbled to find it in my pockets, Dex laughed and Crazy On You filled our car. I felt blood rush to my head, knowing that Dex would find some way to make fun of it later. I was more pissed than anything, really, since that was me and Dianne's song.

I found the phone in my left coat pocket; how I'd forgotten it was there was beyond me. Just as the ringtone started to loop around for the third time, I pressed the green button on the screen before pulling the phone out of my pocket. As I brought the speaker up to my ear, I could hear her crying and I immediately got worried. Dianne never cried unless it was important. Even Dex shut up when he heard her voice cracking.

“J-Jack... You need to be home. Right now!” I was silent for a few moments.

“Jack! Jack Carnegie, you say something right now or so help me-!”

“Just calm down, okay? Calm down and tell me what happened! What's wrong?”

“I-I n-need you here, Jack... Someone broke in, and there's blood, and and and -”

I was more than thankful that my phone was loud when Dex immediately popped the car into Drive and floored it, Sirens blaring. I looked over to my friend and nodded thanks before turning my full attention back to Dianne.

“Shh,” I comforted as best as I could over a phone. “It's gonna be okay, okay? Where're the Kids?”

“They're-they're fine. Ally's still at School and Parker's at practice.”

“Oh thank God,” I sighed. “Just don't touch anything. We're on our way right now!”

“Hurry Jack... Please!”

“Don't hang up the phone, stay on the line, okay? I'll be there as soon as I can!”

“Dex, you get me back home as soon as you can, you got it?”

Any other time, Dex would've chuckled and made some kinda joke. This time, though? This time, he didn't answer me. He didn't even blink. Dex just kept turning the wheel as hard and as fast as he could when he needed to. Our car flew between signs, parked cars, and through red lights. All the while I continued to make sure she was okay. I kept running through everything she was saying in the back of my head, trying to make sense of it all. When I saw our street sign, I was relieved.

“Di, we're coming down the road now! Where are you?”

“I'm right in front of the house! I-I don't wanna be in there right now, Jack...”

“It's okay, I see you!” I couldn't help but smile as I felt my heart soar.

She looked okay from here, and that was all that mattered right now. Dex parked the car behind Dianne's Avalanche. The large truck made our patrol car look like a toy most days, but today, with the lights on, our patrol car looked more intimidating than the biggest truck you could imagine. Though that might've been because I jumped out before the car even stopped and rushed to see my wife. Or possibly because I swear I heard Dex jump over the hood of our car.

I was surprised to see no other cops around, investigating the scene. Had she not called 911? Just because I was a cop didn't mean I could take care of everything!

Dianne threw her arms around my neck, sobbing. I held her as close as I could, feeling myself grow warmer. I winced as a burning sensation started on my chest and started to spread. Dianne pulled away from me, looking worried. I looked at her, sweating and clutching my chest. Everything turned shades of orange and red with tinges of black on the edges of everything. Like an outline of ashes.

She started screaming, but I couldn't hear her. The pain in my chest spread throughout my body. I could feel every part of me erupt in pain, and I tried to scream. All I heard was an unearthly roar come from everywhere. Dex stepped in front of me, smiling. I reached out to him, begging for his help, and I noticed my hand. It was.... on fire? My whole body was on fire! What the hell?!

Dex started laughing at me, but that roar wouldn't let up! I saw Dianne behind him keep screaming, and Dex turned to her and fired his pistol without even a second's hesitation. I saw her fall to the ground. I could feel myself crying, screaming at God to fix whatever he'd done. And then everything exploded into flames. And I felt myself crumble away into nothing.